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Most Dangerous Object in the Office: Solowheel Motorized Unicycle

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Most Dangerous Object in the Office: BTC40 Tesla Coil

Flip on the BTC40 in your cubicle, and it’ll dispense 500,000-volt sparks of electricity. You’ll look like a deranged genius.

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Most Dangerous Object in the Office: Mo-Tool Ax

Brook & Hunter’s Mo-Tool is quite a monstrosity, but you can’t frown on it forever — it has an ax!

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Most Dangerous Object in the Office: Pocket Artillery Mini Cannon

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Most Dangerous Object in the Office: Ideal 0101 Hard Drive Punch

Using the Ideal 0101 punch to obliterate the contents of your hard drive makes you feel like a badass Van Helsing of the workplace.

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20.06 Most Dangerous Object in the Office: Wicked Lasers Torch

20.06 Most Dangerous Object in the Office: Wicked Lasers Torch. Let’s Burn Ants! (No animals were harmed in the making of this video; humans however, were)

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Most Dangerous Object in the Office: Ikaros Line Thrower

When we’re stuck in a meeting, we usually text a savior to call us out of the room. But ever since this $599 maritime rescue device came in, we’ve been dreaming about zip-lining out the window.

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Most Dangerous Object in the Office: Supreme Products Pocket Chain Saw

Set the office a-chattering when you whip out this 4-ounce human-powered chain saw. Then set that leg on your office chair straight.

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Most Dangerous Object in the Office: Lee Production Pot IV Electric Melter

Some people use the Lee Production Pot metal melter to make bullets. Wired’s editors are pleased with their hand-forged paper clips.

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Most Dangerous Object in the Office: North Face Avalanche Airbag Safety...

No matter the danger&mash;a torrent of gizmos or an avalanche of snow—this North Face system will have your back (Saint Bernard and brandy not included).

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Most Dangerous Object in the Office: Cyborg Crampons

These stainless steel cleats will will grip rock, ice, particleboard—whatever cubicle wall that blocks your path.

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Most Dangerous Object in the Office: AeroShot Pure Energy

A quick powdery blast of vitamin B, niacin, and caffeine courtesy of Breathable Foods could be just the (legal) pick-me-up you need.

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